Love is a tax paying responsibility to everyone who genuinely engage him or herself into it. “Love is not Enough”
By Pastor Misheal Tomizayi
It is widely said that when the purpose of a thing is not known, the abuse of it is inevitable. The word “Love” has so long been used in time of two opposite sex dwelling together. “Love” is an upgrade of the word “Like”. But love is not enough if the meaning and purpose of a man and woman coming together under a sacred bond shelter called marriage is not known or well defined.
God designed marriage for the purpose of intimacy. Marriage is the act that brings beautiful and intimate relationship shared uniquely husband and wife in the privacy of their love.
A lack of understanding of the importance of marriage is the root cause of an unhappy family. Marriage is designed God to be a place of honour. There was a time when men were ready to fight for the woman they loved. They did that not to take possession of her but to win her heart and prove their love for her.
Love is a tax paying responsibility to everyone who genuinely engage him or herself into it.
Bible speaking in Ephesians 5:21-25 saying:
“Submit yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord”.
For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church: and He is the Saviour of the Body.
Therefore as Church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husband in everything. Husbands, love your wives as Christ love the Church and gave himself for it.
Love in marriage is a demanding responsibility that requires divine strength and strategy that over shadow Human strength and understanding to bring God’s desire upon your home.
I do not know what you have been brought up to believe about marriage (and it may well be that you have not been brought up in that area at all) but you should know that marriage is not an amusement for Boys and girls. Marriage is not kindergarten game. Marriage is a step of responsibility for people that are matured enough to approach it with honour and dignity.
One of the clamoring best selling gossips and newspaper headlines, blogs and social media stories in our societies, nation and around the globe is the story of infidelity, divorce and rage of anger in marriage that result into murder. One of such examples is the story of a woman trading the waves of media in our country Nigeria, Mrs. Maryam Sanda who reason of her marital crisis allow her anger to overshadow her circumstance that patient control have pacified and committed manslaughter of her husband, and verdict of the punishment declared her death hanging.
The reason why we have so many crisis in families is because many people have simply perverted the concept of marriage and the family. They also lack Biblical understanding and good parental guide on how it works. (According as your faith maybe, because no religion faith encourage marriage crisis). Most women get married because they believed they are in love with the man, but soon realize they thought it should be, not realizing the work, the thoughts, the efforts and self sacrifice involved. But in real sense love is profoundly tender and passionate emotion of affection, which entails an affectionate concern for the persons well being whom you love as also importantly, love must be worked out you.
The world is sick and one of the sickness of this world is the sickness of marriage. We must heal the world and heal it’s sickness. We must heal marriages.
As pastors, spiritual leaders we are not to be the “patients” of this world, we are called to be “doctors” of this world when it comes to spiritual and family matters. But for this, it is essential that we understand God’s remedies for healing the world and God’s divine standard of living and guidance for marriage.
Divorce in marriage is not the solution to marital crisis because, every misunderstanding or misconception in marriage left unhandled or not sorted out both parties results into uncontrolled crisis.
For a man to be left uncared for and unattended to is at the risk of dishonor in life. But when a woman understand her role in her husband’s life and apply herself to fulfilling that assignment, she facilitate her husbands honour. Proverbs 31:23.
Men who are disinterested and women who are averse to their respective responsibilities or marital obligation, increase tension in the home, and this tension is often followed unkind and selfish expression or conduct that can be disastrous to a marriage in many case an unfulfilled sex life lead to infidelity or divorce.
Most couples today are attracted to each other on the emotional and physical levels because they are thrown together in a work or social environment. They notice that their body chemistry or as I like to refer to, biological magnetic attraction sparks an emotional response. This is always an exciting experience for two red blooded young people of the opposite sex. But if they lack a spiritual dimension to life, their first contact will produce additional associations that in turn fan their emotions and further spark their physical attraction. If they have been brain washed today free love precepts of campus humanists, they may start living together and enjoy expressing their drives much as animals do.
Every couple is destined to discover after marriage that they are not similar in their likes and dislikes as they had thought before marriage. Their backgrounds, intelligence, and education maybe different and they may find themselves strongly disagreeing on such vital issues as money, children, manners, family, business and social events. If this differences can be faced unselfishly, they will not create incompatibility; but if self reigns on the throne of their will, they are going to indulge in thoughts patterns of ingratitude, revenge and animosity. Such thoughts turn love, joy and peace into bitterness and hatred which is the very ingredient that produce incompatibility and results into open invitation of evil results that left many homes and marriages into inrrecoverable regrets. My prayers for you today is that may your home receive a remedy before the arrival of every spell of crisis in marriage that will leave you wondering how did you arrive at an irrecoverable state of hate and regret in Jesus name.
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